Wednesday, February 21, 2007

Bush & al Maliki Conduct Similar Investigations

The democracy brothers show similar skills in conducting investigations. Both aim to show their side in the best light as they whitewash bad to incompetent behavior by their minions. Iraq Prime Minister al Maliki had this to say after a Sunni woman accused security forces of multiple counts of rape.

The woman "had not been subjected to any sexual attack" and that three outstanding warrants had been issued against her for unspecified charges. He also accused "certain parties" - a thinly veiled reference to Sunni politicians - of fabricating the allegation. In exonerating the three officers Tuesday, al-Maliki said they should be rewarded as a sign of confidence in the force.

The victim was admitted to a U.S. medical facility that same day. A military spokesman said they released the woman Monday with her taking her medical records with her. He refused comment on the findings of the medical exam.

Does this mean al Maliki did not have access to her medical record if she “took it with her”? How long does it take to conduct a proper rape investigation? How many rapes crimes are completely concluded within 36 hours in the U.S.?

The incident happened Sunday, the victim treated Sunday-Monday, and the Prime Minister had a definitive answer Tuesday complete with rewards for the accused and the firing of key Sunni official critical of the crime? How many of those accused are actually rewarded by the U.S. government? Here’s my guess as to how the investigation ran?

Investigator: Did you rape this woman?

Policeman #1: No, she was a whore and begged me to please her.

Policeman #2: Nouri was unable to satisfy her and as a gentleman I thought it my duty to help.

Investigator (turning to third suspect): She accuses you of using a black hose to beat her before raping her

Policeman #3: She had already been defiled by the other two men and deserved punishment. After the beating her repentance was complete. As a whole woman again she asked me to screw her. Being the gentlemen I complied.

Investigator: All three of you are gentlemen. Case closed. Nouri al Maliki is great! May he promote us all in Bush like fashion!

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