Monday, June 25, 2007

Student Loses Nearly Free Speech Case

A high school student posted a 14 foot white paper banner using $3 duct tape that offended school officials. The teen displayed the poster "Bong Hits for Jesus" while the Olympic Torch paraded through town. The picture above shows the fire used to light the communion bong. In an effort to update the Eucharist, the student substituted a brown leafy substance for wine as both can give you a buzz. The U2 Eucharist must be envious.

Despite his best efforts to display the poster in a humorous light, the Supreme Court suggested the speech was "nearly free" and thus offensive. Had the student fueled the economy by hiring WPP and paid hundreds of thousands in TV advertising time, the Court would have ruled in his favor. Better luck next time, little guy! You have to spend more than $3 as there is no such thing anymore as "nearly free" speech. And don't get me started on its monitoring...

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