Wednesday, April 26, 2006

So All of You Are “Powerful”, Now Please Put Your Manhood Back in Your Pants

Dear President Bush,

Who said what in the recent rhetorical escalation between the U.S., Iran and Israel? For each statement place either an IR to indicate an Iranian leader, an A for an American official or an IS to signify an Israeli delegate. The blank lines afford you possible bonus points. For each correct write in a point will be awarded.

1. We are powerful and able to defend ourselves.
2. _______ reiterated his determination to establish a "new reality" in the region, either through negotiations or unilaterally.
3. The _________ nation and its officials are peace-seekers
4. We want to end this cycle of violence
5. We are in good hands with ____
6. "The __________ should know that if they (invade/attack) us, their interests around the world would be harmed. _____ will respond twofold to any attack."

Are you ready for the answers?

1. “We are powerful and able to defend ourselves”-IS, Israel’s Prime Minister Olmert
2. Israeli Prime Minister Olmert reiterated his determination to establish a “new reality” in the region, either through negotiations or unilaterally. IS is correct. (If you marked U or IR you get partial credit as Bush and Ahmadinejad’s actions clearly send this message)
3. The Iranian nation and its officials are peace-seekers. (Credit only will be given for Iran despite its similarity to Bush’s statement about democracies being peace loving.)
4. “We want to end this cycle of violence”. IS, spoken by Prime Minister Olmert as the Israeli military makes plans to re-enter portions of the Gaza Strip.
5. “We are in good hands with Bushstate”. IS, spoken by the Israeli PM in an apparent twist on the Allstate commercial. With scant progress since introducing the Road Map for Peace, Israel has had virtual carte blanche to deal with the Palestinians during most of the Bush presidency.
6. "The Americans should know that if they invade us, their interests around the world would be harmed. Iran will respond twofold to any attack." IR, spoken by Iran’s supreme leader Ayatollah Ali Khamenei. While this sounds similar to the rationale for invading Iraq, Bush is not the correct answer. Those who used terrorists and the U.S. also missed the boat.

So how did you do? With a possible 11 points how many did you get? I know you are a hyper-competitive guy and interested in measures, but the score doesn’t really matter. Did you notice the similarity in lingo by the 3 leaders in the mouth off? All talk tough as if it reveals their manhood. I say sheath your swords or whatever you are holding in your hand, waving about.

1 comment:

dusty said...

I missed number 5..thats it!

They remind me of young boys that swagger in a futile attempt to show they are now men in control..when we all know they are not.