Sunday, April 01, 2007

Bush Worried about Matter, Anti-Matter Meeting

In Bush's world lines are drawn, sides are as clear as matter and anti-matter. Domestically Republicans are the matter and Democrats the anti-matter. When they collide major combustion occurs. They net each other out leaving the voters with nothing more than a concussion blast.

Internationally the democratic, capitalist West is matter and the Axis of Evil composed of anti-matter. Iran and Syria are the only two remaining countries from the "old axis" list. North Korea followed Libya by just changing its evil ways while Iraq has been freed to flourish as a democracy. However, inching their way towards anti-matter status are the Russians and Chinese.

The reason the Bush team won’t meet with Iran or Syria is he doesn’t want the two opposing explosive forces coming into contact. So what happens when an anti-matter Democratic leader travels to Israel to meet with their clearly material Prime Minister Ehud Olmert? Once there House Speaker Nancy Pelosi did not explode, she promised to carry the Israeli message to Syria. So why didn’t Nancy and Ehud cancel each other out?

It turns out Nancy was converted at a recent AIPAC meeting. Speaker Pelosi is now a card carrying materialistic, capitalistic fan of America’s greatest ally in the Middle East. So President Bush doesn’t need to worry about Nancy meeting with Syrian leaders. She won’t add any anti-matter to their stockpile. Let’s just hope she wears one of those special suits that Christopher Hill wore to negotiate with the North Koreans when she delivers Ehud Olmert’s message. I’d hate to see a matter, anti-matter conflagration. It could mess up her hair and ruin Bush's cute nickname for her, "Pelo-chia-pet".

What happens if Nancy segways over to Iran to negotiate the British soldier release? President Bush just recalled America's tragic history with Iran by calling them “hostages”. In an odd twist, 200 Iranian students protested outside the British embassy chanting “Death to Britain” and throwing stones. If someone wanted the grease the skids for a Western attack on Iran, these images would be invaluable.

Likewise, Ms. Nancy Pelosi recently dropped any Congressional restrictions on attacking Iran. This happened during the huge AIPAC Policy and Issues convention in Washington D.C. What about Nancy’s recent meeting partner, Israeli P.M. Olmert? Just the other day he said now is "not the right time" to invade Gaza to root out a reportedly growing Hamas military threat. What is more pressing for the Jewish state? Do they have their eye on the Iranian ball as well? It’s perilously close to the nuclear technology no going back date offered by Israel’s Foreign Minister Tzipi Livni sometime last fall.

There’s so much matter and anti-matter. It’s just a question of when and where it will meet…

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