My connecting flight boarded late and I stood at the end of the line. Surely there would be no room in the overhead bin for my luggage. Bah humbug, I checked the bag at the gate.
After stowing my laptop beneath the seat, I envisioned a nap. To my surprise the flight attendant didn't deliver the usual safety spiel. She offered her version of The Night Before Christmas (which I'll post if it's shared with me). This inspired my derivative version:
Twas two nights before Christmasand all through the plane,weary travelers expected the usual inane.But this safety briefing rang with humor and heartthat no corporate script could ever impart.
Travelers perked up their ears, smiles broadened wideas Stewardess #1 delivered line after line.The pilot announced he and the first matewould hold up the trip, making us a little late.Important packages were destined for the hold.Gifts for our loved ones, young and old.
These acts took place on one solitary flightof an airline in bankruptcy, what a terrible plight.Pay will be cut and pensions obliterated,so executive bonuses can be liberated.
Yet this crew set aside the cards they face,giving great joy to the human race.Keep this a secret, whatever you do.Corporate PR would never approve.
Christmas flickers in each heart's light,especially in those facing challenges of blight.Many thanks to the creative word stew,the pilot, first mate, the whole inspired crew.
They brought me home for Christmas,long before the plane finished its flight.Love and joy to all,
and to all a good night!
This message can be reproduced by anyone except corporate lawyers intent on finding my identity, which bankrupt airline I flew and what crew worked the flight, which was actually a sleigh ride. Legal beagles, that means reindeer tracking!
Update 2-9-12: Reuters reported "AMR filed for Chapter 11 on November 29, citing a need to trim uncompetitive labor costs. The company told employees last week that it aims to cut expenses by $2 billion a year, slash about 13,000 jobs and terminate pensions. AMR also intends to generate $1 billion per year in new revenue." It also stated "American already has plenty of cash, a strong domestic route network and service to Europe and Asia as well as related oneworld alliance partners in London and Tokyo."